Reality Bites

My goodness it’s been a while. I have been MIA from the blogosphere over the past few weeks to ‘find myself’.

Since my last post, I was feeling great, was faced with a fantastic career opportunity to showcase my skills as a leader and was ready to take the bull by the horns.

But something happened, something that I did not intend to happen – my mind started playing tricks on me.

Over the past few weeks I have felt beyond overwhelmed. I began feeling like I was losing a sense of who I was, felt like I was crawling out of my own skin. Everything was getting to me, being a wife, mother, homemaker, dog owner, everything. The identify that had been my own for the past 31 years was slowly ceasing to exist and morphing me into someone that I was no longer recognizing.

I began feeling disconnected from reality. I was questioning my every move, rating myself as a wife and doubting my parenting skills, as a result of all this I began suffering from insomnia (and it was not a pretty picture).

I knew that I needed to stop and get a hold of myself. I needed to put things into perspective and see things for what they were not for how they could be.

I needed to find my inner peace, find my true self again. In order to do this I decided to consult with some friends, moms, which through conversation made me realize that I was 1. not losing my mind, 2. not the only one going through this mental debacle and most importantly, 3. not a disappointment to myself, husband or son.

Motherhood is a transition that as far as I could remember has not been written in any mommy books. No one tells you of the possible emotional effects that you may have as a new parent based decisions made. For me becoming a mom wasn’t the difficult part, it the transition from becoming a working woman to a stay-at-home mom that has taken a toll on my being.

I was feeling disconnected from the real world, was lacking that adult conversation/interaction that as humans we all crave and need. With that, I decided to create my own sanctuary, meet with friends, talk to them regularly and most importantly, take time out for myself. As a mother that is the one thing that most of us do not do and is the one thing that we need to make sure that we do, do.

So as time passed and after assessing my life and everything around me, I have to say that I have been truly blessed. I am happy with the life that I have, am ecstatic about the great husband, beautiful little boy in my life and for every single opportunity put before me and with that I began getting myself back on track.

Back on track to once again being that strong, vibrant, funny (if I must say so), enthusiastic woman, wife and mother.

Anyone, who feeling overwhelmed should take a deep breath and talk to someone.  Someone you trust, value and will support you through it all.

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